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Cardinal Karl Josef Becker, a Cardinal, died at the spry age of 86

His doctoral dissertation in theology was “Die Rechtfertigungslehre nach Domingo de Soto. Das Denken eines Konzilstellnehmers vor, in und nach Trient”, which translates to “The doctrine of justification by Domingo de Soto . Thinking of a council parking contractor before , during and after Trent.”

Man, glad I translated that.  Now I totally know what it’s about.

He served his novitiate (the time that you are considered a novice) in Cologne at the University of Cologne.  It was while serving in Cologne that he came up with the idea for Cross Body Spray, an eau-de-toilette for douchy Christians.  It’s only available in New Jersey now.

He taught dogmatic theology at the Philosophical-Theological University Sankt Georgen, from 1969.  This may not sound

"Who's a good Cardinal, huh?  Who's a good Cardinaly-wardnaly?  YOU'RE good boy, aren't you?... have a Snausage."

“Who’s a good Cardinal, huh? Who’s a good Cardinaly-wardnaly? YOU’RE good boy, aren’t you?… have a Snausage.”

impressive, but think about how hard it is to get dogs to convert to Christianity.

On 22 April 2012, the seizure of his titles Diakonia took place.  I’m just gonna go ahead here and assume that Google translator fucked that sentence up.

In 2012 he was presented with the Cologne Carnival order by the Cologne Carnival Festival Committee.  The Carnival Festival Committee is made up of a bunch of clowns wearing Cross Body Spray.

We all know who has this hit (hell next year, I’m pickin’ a few cardinals just to fuck with him).  Imaginary Steve claws his way up to 4th place with 40 points.  In doing so, he topples your fearless Ghoul Pool Administrator from 4th to 5th place.

I will need some consoling.

Happy pooling,


Current Standings:

Tailgating with Jesus: 80 – (Jean Béliveau – 20, Ernie Banks – 20, Jerry Tarkanian – 20)

Jami: 70 – (Diem Brown)

Nikki: 60 – (Stuart Scott – 60)

I-Steve (a.k.a: The Arch-Bishop!): 40 – (Fiorenzo Angelini – 10, Jorge María Mejía – 10, Cardinal Karl Josef Becker – 20)

Fearless Ghoul Pool Administrator: 30 – (King Abdullah – 10, Joe Franklin – 20)

Anne: 30 – (Joe Cocker – 30)

Team Sushi: 30 – (Marion Barry – 30)

Mostly Mike: 20 – (Ralph H Baer – 10, Edward W. Brooke III – 10)

The Girl on Fire: 20 – (Mario Cuomo – 20)

The Mortician’s Daughter:  10 – (“Little” Jimmy Dickens – 10)


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