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Professional coat-tail-rider, Natalie Cole, died at the spry age of 65.

Cole is known for being the daughter of the truly amazing jazz singer, Nat “King” Cole.  Every single one of Nat’s songs are simply wonderful pieces of art (except for “Those Lazy Hazy Crazy Days Of Summer,” that song just sucks balls).

In 1951, Nat recorded one of his greatest hits, “Unforgettable.”  The brilliance of this song cannot be understated.  It a beautifully written and sung sweeter than honeysuckle on the vine (according to Emmet Otter).

Forty years later, because she wanted money, his daughter Natalie re-recorded “Unforgettable” in 1991.  All she really did was play her dad’s record and sang some glorified backup.  It was (and still is) a complete disgrace.  Frankly, she might as well have recorded a country song.

In 1992, this travesty won the Grammy for Song of the Year.

Let’s take a look at that, shall we?

The Grammys stipulate that The Song of the Year “must contain melody

Natalie Cole.gif

Natalie Cole, learning about the loopholes in copy-write infringement at a young age.

and lyrics and must be either a new song or a song first achieving prominence during the eligibility year. Songs containing prominent samples or interpolations are not eligible.”

So, the question remains: What the fuck?  Clearly this song not only should never have won, but it never should never have even been nominated.  It simply does not qualify for multiple reasons!

“Geez, Sean what’s the big deal.  it’s not like anything good was nominated…”

You know what else was nominated?  “Nothing Compares 2 U” by Prince.  Prince!  A motherfucking Prince classic takes a back seat to a fucking karaoke tape! (After that only crap was nominated.  “Another Day in Paradise” by Phil Collins?  Puh-lease.  The world obviously needed Grunge.)

Crap like this is proof that the free market implodes upon itself.

This hit goes to: Occupy the Casket!  Pirate is on the board with 40 points!  She is just another 40 points away from the inevitability of pulling ahead of the Ghoul Pool Administrator.  

Nancy Reagan, somehow, still continues to live.

Happy pooling,

SPMI

PS:  Nothing fucking Compares 2 fucking U!!!!

Current Standings:

Lee Kwang-Soo (Giraffe): 70- (Daniel Fleetwood – 70)

Jami: 60 – (Scott Weiland  -60)

Occupy the Casket: 40 – (Natalie Cole – 40)

Tailgating w/ Jesus: 40 (Dolph Schayes – 20, Meadowlark Lemon – 20)

Age of Aquarius: 30 (William Guest – 30)

The Girl on Fire: 20 (Wayne Rogers – 20)

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