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Neocon, fascist and Supreme Court Justice, Antonin Scalia died in his sleep at the spry age of 79 while on a quail hunting trip at the Cibolo Creek Ranch in Shafter, Texas.

Scalia was born in Trenton New Jersey because of course he’s from Jersey.

Scalia has been instrumental in many decisions that were seemingly designed to bring this country down from the inside.

Some may recall the 2000 election where the Presidency was handed to the man who lost the election.  The Supreme Court decision that said “Our consideration is limited to the present circumstances”.  In other words: “We’re gonna do this this once, but it’s not the law of the land or anything.”  Which is the exact opposite of what the Supreme Court does!

Justice Clarence Thomas was in total agreement with Scalia on this one.

Scalia

I liked him better as Mr. C on “Happy Days.”

In Citizens United, he justified treating corporations as people by opining that “Modern corporations… would probably have been favored by most of our enterprising Founders.”  So, forget what the constitution says because some of our forefathers probably might have thought this.  Yeah, that’s some goooood jurisprudence.

Justice Clarence Thomas totally agreed, by the way.

In his decision for Hobby Lobby he said “Well, religious beliefs aren’t reasonable. …God be reasonable? He’s supposed to have a full beard.”  Yes, a Supreme Court Justice who referred to God’s beard to support his argument.  Ladies and gentlemen, I give you: America.

Justice Clarence Thomas totally agreed, by the way.

The office of Clarence Thomas released a mysterious statement to the press that just said “** paste Scalia’s statement here **”.  

When contacted for clarification, his office stated that Justice Thomas had “died in his sleep at the spry age of 79 while on a quail hunting trip at the Cibolo Creek Ranch in Shafter, Texas.”

It’s a big question as to who will replace Scalia… but even bigger is who will fill the void left in Clarence Thomas’ heart?  Who will he blindly agree with now?  He’s a ship without a rudder.  

Wouldn’t it be great if he grabbed onto the coattails (or in this case, flowing robes) of Sonia Sotomayor?  Suddenly his opinions would be more liberal, plus with a sassy, hispanic tinge to them.

But I think that things are still awkward between those two since last year’s Christmas party when he put a pubic hair on her Coke can.

This hit goes to: Mortician’s Daughter!  She gets on the board with a strong 30 points!  Although, the Supreme Court might strip her of her points… you know, just this one time…

Until then, congrats to Cindy!

Nancy Reagan, somehow, still continues to live.  

Happy pooling,

SPMI

Current Standings:

Lee Kwang-Soo (Giraffe): 80- (Daniel Fleetwood – 70, Abe Vigoda – 10)

Jami: 80 – (Scott Weiland  – 60, Pat Harrington, Jr. – 20)

The Girl on Fire: 50 (Wayne Rogers – 20, René Angélil – 30)

Tailgating w/ Jesus: 50 (Dolph Schayes – 20, Meadowlark Lemon – 20, Monte Irvin – 10)

Occupy the Casket: 40 – (Natalie Cole – 40)

Mortician’s Daughter: 30 – (Justice Antonin Scalia – 30)

Age of Aquarius: 30 (William Guest – 30)

Mostly Mike: 20 (Marvin Minsky – 20)

Gianna: 20 (Robert Stigwood – 20)

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