POLO!

Catholic Cardinal Marco (Polo!) Cé (pronounced “Say”) died at the spry age of 88.  He apparently drown while wandering blindly around in a pool, looking for someone.

Marco (Polo!) was appointed Auxiliary Bishop of Bologna, which had a first name of O-S-C-A-R.  It had a second name… but that was too Jewish for the Catholic Church.

Cardinal Marco (Polo!) used his free time after retiring to conduct retreats for bishops, priests, religious orders and lay groups.  Here, I’m assuming that the lay groups were all about getting laid…  I could probably check on that somewhere… but that would take effort.

This is an image that came up when I did a Google image search… so it clearly must be the 88-year-old Cardinal Marco (Polo!) Cé.

Pope “Eggs” Benedict once said that, “Marco (Polo!)’s lay retreats were a real swinger’s paradise.  They got so wild, we had to start holding them on a cruise in international waters.”  He continued, “It started looking like Noah’s Ark if you know what I mean… you see, there were animals… on the boat… just like the ark… but they were used for salacious purposes…”

Eggs was never good with a joke.

But Marco (Polo!) will best be known for the Paul McCartney & Michael Jackson tribute “Cé, Cé, Cé.” in 1983.  It was kinda creepy that they kept referring to Marco (Polo!) as “Baby,” and “she.”  Even worse, that they kept professing that their love was real… You know… I wonder if that song is really about Marco (Polo!)…. And looking at how they spell Cé as “Say”… OK, maybe I’ll check my sources on that.

This hit goes to: well, duh… “Imaginary” Steve!  Who the hell else picked any Cardinals this year?  Maybe Bean… but that would be of the St. Louis ilk.

Happy pooling,

SPMI

Current Standings:

Jami: 190 (Ariel Sharon – 20, Philip Seymour Hoffman – 60, Peaches Geldof – 80, Rubin “The Hurricane” Carter – 30)

Starving Writer – 100 (James Avery – 6’ 5” – 40, L’Wren Scott – 6’4” – 60)

Tailgating with Jesus – 80 (Jerry Coleman – 20, Ralph Kiner – 10, William Clay Ford – 20, Ralph Wilson -10, Jack Ramsay – 20)

Gianna 80 (Tom Laughlin – 20, Alicia Rhett – 10, Mae Young – 10, Ruth Robinson Duccini – 10, Pete Seeger – 10, Fred Phelps – 20, Marc Platt – 0)

“Imaginary” Steve: 70 (Cardinal Domenico Bartolucci – 10, Cardinal Ricardo Carles Gordo – 20, Emmanuel III Delly – 20, Marco (Polo!) Cé – 20)

Joanne: 70 (Ace Parker – 0, Nelson Mandela – 10,  Ray Price – 20, Maximilian Schell – 20, Connie Marrero – 0, Al Feldstein – 20)

Good to the Last Drop (© Maxwell House) – 60 (Frederick Sanger – 10, Maxine Kumin – 20, Efrem Zimbalist, Jr. – 10, Gary Becker – 20)

The Girl on Fire: 50 (Eleanor Parker – 10, Dave Madden – 20, Ralph Waite – 20)

Occupy the Casket: 40 (Ronnie Biggs – 20, Harold Camping – 10, Dick Ayers – 10)

Babysitter: 40 (Mikhail Kalashnikov – 10, Russell Johnson – 20, Mickey Rooney – 10 )

SPMI: 40 (Peter O’Toole – 20, Joan Fontaine – 10, Sid Caesar – 10)

Team Sushi – 30 (Bob Hoskins – 30)

Dora the Explorer: 20 (Jeremiah Denton – 20)

The Girl on Fire: 20 (Ralph Waite – 20)

Mostly Mike: 20 (Shirley Temple Black – 20)

Carol’s 1%: 20 (Harold Simmons – 20)

Dick in Town: 10 (Hiroo Onoda – 10)

My dead guy has a 1st name; It’s O-s-c-a-r…

My dead guy has a second name; it’s N-i-e-m-e-y-e-r.

Acclaimed Brazilian architect, Oscar Niemeyer died at the not-so-spry age of 104.  This leaves Brazil with about zero acclaimed architects.

Now, I could make the obvious observations, like how his style was so clearly influenced by Le Corbusier.  Or how, as Nicolai Ouroussoff so poignantly pointed out, his later works suffered from age.

That spot on his right cheek? That’s from when Judas Iscariot bitch-slapped him in a bar-room brawl.

But I would rather concentrate on how fucking old he was.  The guy was 104 years old!  His most famous designs include the Pyramids of Giza, Stonehenge and the Colossus of Rhodes.

This guy cut his teeth designing caves.  He apprenticed under Noah (who was really more about designing ships).  Unfortunately, much of his work was destroyed in Pompeii.

The real question here is: Who would draft someone so old?  An idiot.  That’s who.

This hit goes to Dawn-n-Mike!… But in all fairness, it really just goes to –n-Mike.

Yes, while Dawn was gathering information on the younger train-wrecks of the world, Mike thought that it would be a nifty strategy to pick someone worth zero points.  Fuckin’ brilliant, Mike.  What’s your next move?  Get some milk on the expiration date? Invest with that Bernie Madoff guy?  Watch a Colin Farrell movie?  Maybe you can refinance your lawnmower.

I mean, it’s not like he’s re-drafting his lock of the year over and over and over and over again… now that’s solid drafting.

So, they make the board, but with the same amount of points as me.

Happy pooling,

SPMI

Current Standings:

Jami – 20 – (Larry Hagman – 20)

Joanne – 10 – (Freddy Schmidt – 10)

Tailgating with Jesus – 10 – (Marvin Miller – 10)

Gainna – 10 – (Lucille Bliss – 10)

“Sister” Mary Sheila – 10 (Lee MacPhail – 10)

Babysitter – 10 (Clive Dunn – 10)

Dawn-n-Mike – 0 (Oscar Niemeyer – 0)