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Singer Kay Starr died at the spry age of 94.

Starr will be remembered for the two number one hits, “Wheel of Fortune,” about a plucky game show host and is non-aging partner and “The Rock And Roll Waltz,” which is less rock and roll and more like the song playing in a Martin Scorsese scene set in the 50s.

Kay became a local radio sensation at age seven and eventually had her own 15-minute show twice a week, earning $3 a performance.  Child labor laws aside, $3 was a hell of a sum of money in the Depression.  [You capitalize Depression when talking about the economic downturn of the 30s, right?]  That converts to a little over $44 in pre-President-Trump dollars.  [Post-President-Trump dollars: it converts back to $3.00.  Vote next Tuesday!]

Her family moved to Memphis, TN.  This move depressed Kay because there was no music scene in Memphis.  Historically, Memphis has been a musical vacuum that can only be

kay-starr

Really?  Me?  I died?

compared to Nashville.  Now, Schenectady!  That was a swingin’ place.  

Despite the lack of a music scene in town, she still managed to keep up gigs and performing on the radio.  At 15, she was chosen to sing with the Joe Venuti orchestra.  Not to be anti-Italian, but there is no way that a bandleader named Venuti was 100% legit.  That’s like saying that a guy named McFeeley is sober.

In order to escape the iron fist of Don Vanuti, she moved to Los Angeles and signed with Wingy Manone’s band because she always wanted to work with someone named “Wingy.”  Honestly, who wouldn’t.  I’m knida hopin’ that HR puts out an ad looking to hire anyone based on the name “Wingy.”

As a bonus, Manone was also the inventor of the chicken wing (hence, the name), so Kay was lousy with wings!  Unfortunately, Buffalo sauce would not be invented for another twenty years.

One of her biggest hits was her version of “(Everybody’s Waitin’ For) The Man with the Bag”, a Christmas song that quickly became a holiday favorite.  This song is awesome and if you do not own a copy, her’s is frickin’ sweet.

This hit goes to: Babysitter!  It’s his first hit this year!  [Really?  Man, he sucks.]  This gives him a firm 10 points, a mere 210 points behind the leader.  Will his list get massacred in the next day and a half?  If so, I’ll have to investigate before awarding points….

Happy pooling,

SPMI

Draft night is TOMORROW!  So exciting!

Current Standings:

Occupy the Casket: 220 – (Natalie Cole – 40, Vanity – 50, Boutros Boutros-Ghali – 10, Geoffrey Eglinton – 20, Addie Fausett – 100)

Jami: 210 – (Scott Weiland  – 60, Pat Harrington, Jr. – 20, Umberto Eco – 20, Rob Ford – 60, Erik Bauersfeld – 10, Edward Albee – 20, Chris Sizemore – 20)

Tailgating w/ Jesus: 140 (Dolph Schayes – 20, Meadowlark Lemon – 20, Monte Irvin – 10, Muhammad Ali – 30, Pat Summitt – 40, Buddy Ryan – 20)

Joanne: 130 (Joey Feek – 60, Joe Garagiola – 10, Julius La Rosa – 20, Buckwheat Zydeco – 40)

Lee Kwang-Soo (Giraffe): 130- (Daniel Fleetwood – 70, Abe Vigoda – 10, Nancy Fucking Reagan! – 10!, George Martin – 10, Elie Wiesel – 20, Mike “Mighty Atom, Jr.” Greenstein – 10)

Occupy the Casket: 120 – (Natalie Cole – 40, Vanity – 50, Boutros Boutros-Ghali – 10, Geoffrey Eglinton – 20)

The Girl on Fire: 120 (Wayne Rogers – 20, René Angélil – 30, George Gaynes – 10, James Noble – 10, Doris Roberts – 10, Marni Nixon – 20, Fyvush Finkel – 10, Steven Hill – 10)

Gianna: 110 (Robert Stigwood – 20, Lois Duncan – 20, Herschell Gordon Lewis – 20, Pete Burns – 50)

Harmony: 100 (Harper Lee – 20, George Kennedy – 10, Frank Sinatra, Jr. – 30, Gene Wilder – 20, Arnold Palmer – 20)

Team Sushi: 80 (Chyna, aka Joanie Laurer – 60, Morley Safer – 20)

Imaginary Steve: 60 – (King Bhumibol Adulyadej – 20, 谢家麟 – 10, 劉令名 – 30)

Mostly Mike: 60 (Marvin Minsky – 20, Mihaly “Michu” Meszaros – 30, Janet Waldo – 10)

Age of Aquarius: 60 (William Guest – 30, Merle Haggard – 30)

Nathaniel: 50 (Alan Young – 10, Kenny Baker – 20, Glenn Yarbrough – 20)

Mortician’s Daughter: 50 – (Justice Antonin Scalia – 30, Bud Collins – 20)

Babysitter: 10 – (Kay Starr – 10)

"No, really, I'll take the nun with the bad hair over this one."  ...what was Captain Von Trapp thinking?

“No, really, I’ll take the nun with the bad hair over this one.” …what was Captain Von Trapp thinking?

Baroness Eleanor Parker died at the spry age of 91.

Parker found herself engaged to a well to-do military man prior to the Nazi occupation of Austria.  She was happy to marry the man and send his six children off to boarding school to never be seen again.

And her plan would have work too, if it weren’t for that meddling nun (in training).

Everything in Baroness Parker’s life was going swimmingly until an interloping nanny came into the picture.

Maria.  With her boy’s haircut.  Her talent for transforming drapes into something much uglier.  And her wishy-washy sing-song attitude toward life.  Often, the Baroness found herself thinking, “I’ll show you a very good place to start.”

Parker feared that this crazy woman with her guitar and songs about mountains, does, rays, herself and her favorite things (which people went on singing during the Christmas season despite the fact that it is beyond doubt NOT a Christmas song nor was it ever intended to be one) would weasel her way into her Captain’s heart.

Parker despised her.  She attempted to have her killed on many occasion, but Maria was always saved by unexpected choreography.

Eventually, Maria seduced the Captain and after a tawdry night filled with boozy songs about the national flower, The Captain decided to jettison this fine, upstanding Baroness.

But Parker was too proud for this.  She saw the writing on the wall.  She dumped the Captain so that she could go live under the Third Reich with her head held high.

But to her dying day, she was bitter about her songs being cut.

This hit goes to: Mary!  The Girl on Fire is now in a four-way tie for first with 10 points!

We now have four people with ten points… yet the average hit is eight points….

Remember, it’s only 326 days until draft night!

Happy Pooling,

SPMI

Current Standings:

The Girl on Fire: 10 (Eleanor Parker – 10)

Joanne: 10 (Ace Parker – 0, Nelson Mandela – 10)

Good to the Last Drop (© Maxwell House ) – 10 (Frederick Sanger – 10)

“Imaginary” Steve: 10 (Cardinal Domenico Bartolucci – 10)

Inventor of the barcode… that’s right, the mother-fucking barcode… somebody had to come up with that shit…, Norman Joseph Woodland, died at the spry age of $91.99.

Woodland's High School yearbook photo.   You'd have to scan it to see what he looked like.

Woodland’s High School yearbook photo. You’d have to scan it to see what he looked like.

OK, this guy lived in Atlantic City during the 20’s & 30’s (think “Boardwalk Empire”) worked on the Manhattan project with mother-fucking J. Robert-fucking-Oppenheimer… but by poking four fingers into the sand, he came up with what would revolutionize the retail industry more than the over-commercialization of Christmas.

I defy you to buy something without a bar code on it.  EVERYTHING has a bar code on it.  Even people in the future (depending on what sci-fi reality you buy into).

Pez dispenser: Bar code!  Webber grill: bar code!  Bottle of vodka: bar code!  Replacement hip: bar code! (no, really!)  The only non-bar code purchase I can remember making: my house.  There were even bar codes in the delivery room!

This was a brilliant pick!  And I know, because I picked him a few years ago.  Alas, I did not pick him this year.

No, this pick redeems the idiot who picked the 104-year-old.  Yes, Dawn-n-Mike (but mostly Mike) picked this one in the 10th round.

Plus, this hit earns the distinction of the first to ever in Ghoul Pool history have two hits and only 10 points!

So, hooray for Dawn-n-Mike (but mostly Mike) for getting on the board with points!

Happy pooling,

SPMI

PS: I let Mike know that in case of a tie, where the years match perfectly, and the months match perfectly and the days match perfectly… his 100+ hit can put him over the top.  Sleep well with that knowledge, Mike.

Current Standings:

Babysitter – 20 (Clive Dunn – 10, Ravi Shankar – 10)

Jami – 20 – (Larry Hagman – 20)

Dawn-n-Mike – 10 (Oscar Niemeyer – 0, Norman Joseph Woodland – 10)

Joanne – 10 – (Freddy Schmidt – 10)

Tailgating with Jesus – 10 – (Marvin Miller – 10)

Gainna – 10 – (Lucille Bliss – 10)

“Sister” Mary Sheila – 10 (Lee MacPhail – 10)